MY FIRST LOVE

I still remember the day I have got to know my first love. It was in the time when I worked for Thornfield. I was about sixteen or seventeen years old. I can’t remember the age exactly. I liked the place at Thornfield very much, it was the best place that I had. I had much to work but it didn't disturb. The time was simply good for me there, because I liked the people very much who surrounded me. First life at Thornfield seemed very quiet, I only surrounded me by Adele, my pupil and the housekeeper of Rochester. By the time she got a friend of me, because she was always very kind and helpful. Before, I never had a real friend. My life changed drastically as, Edward Rochester, the owner of the estate arrived to us. First, I didn't have a lot to do with him. He was also much older than me. I think he already shut on the forty. I externally liked him, he was big, dark-haired, sporting and had an attractive face. But I already felt a feeling at our first meeting which, I didn't know before. Within the months following on this, we got to know us better and became friends. But this peculiar feeling got stronger and stronger. Until I recognized the truth of this feeling. I was in love into my work giver and friend. Whenever we met, tickled it in my belly and a smile conjured itself up on my face. But I was afraid to confess my feelings to him. He was my employer and to this still much more older than me. I knew that he didn't feel the same for me. But sometimes I couldn't conceal it any more and simply had to tell it to him. I wondered for a long time how I could tell him. I still know, when he picked me up with his black sports car. We briefly went to drink only a tea, then he brought me back again. Due to his atmosphere I didn't dare to confess my feelings to him. When I got out, he still gave me a letter with the label "my last thoughts". I read the letter, when I saw Rochester around the curve driving. He wrote in this letter about his senses of me and that he could conceal her no more. But he also wrote that he couldn't live with these feelings any more and that he would depart certainly on this following day. I didn't have a driver's licence. I nevertheless took the car from the housekeeper and went to the station. At the last moment I still could hold him back. I told him what I felt. In the end I was very happy despite of the events. Our relation held for only for 3 years. But I will never forget him.